Language Learners With A Sense Of Humor Pillows

"Maybe I can teach you Spanish with some songs I remember singing as a young man."

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

A Copy Editor and His Dog

"Sarah's grades are excellent. She got A+ in 'Yogi Berra: Philosopher or Fall Guy?,' A in 'Dollars and Scents: An Analysis of Post-Vietnam Perfume Advertising,' A in 'The Final Four as Last Judgment: The N.C.A.A. Tournament from a Religious Perspective,'

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

"You can use the alphabet to text. You can use the alphabet to tweet. Why can't you use the alphabet to spell?"

"I'm eating baklava through my balaclava!"

With the aid of a tactical dictionary, and was finally able to make sense of what the salesman was saying.

How's your nephew doing in human school this year? Great! He has a calculator and spell checker like last year, and this fall new features have been added. With new translation software he can take language classes now, and for social studies he just clicks "history." Bonjour! I'm so proud! He has the school's highest G.P.A.! Other students can't copy off him anymore because he started using encrypted code. His favorite upgrade is the enhanced ability to process school lunches. He's bee

'When we all get together, we sure are vulgar.'

Illegal Immigrants

Vegan Restaurant: ''amburgers! Sausages! RISSOLES!'

"You got a D in English and an E in French, but Swedish isn't a problem?!"

No, that's "Virginia Wolf" with one "o."

"Baldo, Gracie...you need to learn more Spanish. For the rest of the week, I'm going to speak nothing but Spanish, and Tia Carmen will act as your interpreter, OK? Tienen tarea?"

"Monsieur has just ordered a vasectomy..."

"I want to make a wish, but the problem is that this genie apparently does not speak English."

"My mom got it on. She said you'd get it off."

Prize vegetables with rude names.

'My French is not so good.'

"How can a student who can't speak English or Gobbledegook expect to pass?"

"We don't have knock-knock jokes on Christmas."

Smirking or Non-smirking

'Apparently, there's some sort of language barrier for me when money talks.'

'He's so clever he's learning a second language!'

"You're actually passing notes in class? That is so retro!"

'I invested in a completely new economic system for the country, but the instructions are in japanese.'

'Try hitting him harder.' 'Is that all you have to say?' 'Try hitting him harder, PLEASE.'

"Omnipotent?! I thought you said impotent. And you're out of wished, too."

"Are you sure they'll be able to read English?"

"What?"

"Pansexual"

"Hey how do you spell Abominable?"