Landladies T-Shirts

'Give them lager and sunglasses.'

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

Lamb Noise.

Well... Tis the season to be jolly!

"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."

Beginning Yarder.

'He misses his garden when he's on holiday'

Red trousers at night - shepherd's delight.

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

'I thought chemistry experiments were after lunch.'

Farmers' Warnings.

Cow and Milk

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP

The Cat's Alarm Clock

'No, that's not my shaving lotion. We've been burning cow chips in the wood stove.'

"That was definitely mine."

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

'Eh, love. The one armed bandit at the end of the bar isn't working.'

"Someday, son, all this will be yours. It'll be under water, but still ..."

'It's only four acres but we're glad we bought it - he's always wanted to be an expert in his own field.'

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

"Blowing the whistle is perfect for a sports bar to let its patrons know that Happy Hour is over."

Goldylocks and the Three Beers.

Modern Calamities. Farmer in the Dell. Do something Maw

'Are you sure you don't have any Indian blood?.'

No early morning tea past this landing

Home Sweet Second Home.

'You made me jump.'

'I'd love to play house, Kevin, but I've got a business to run.'

Farmyard Sinatra - "Start spreadin'...Manure

"You did order the chemical-free insecticide."

The Speculators