Lager Loyalist Pillows

'No Mr Moss, 'Alcoholic Poisoning' doesn't mean that pork pie you had with your 12 pints of lager was 'a bit iffy'!'

Bottle Distillery

'Yessir, Ben us fly fisherman answer to a higher calling.'

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

Beer Stall

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

A member of a very populous consumer group attempts to go shopping...

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

Father and son with matching beer crates.

We're so pleased with your twenty years work, we've decided to offer you a two year short term contract.

'Don't you think your Jim has taken getting his favourite sun lounger as far as it can go?'

"...an excellent fighting lager with just a hint of park bench."

'So how did you manage to get your saline replaced with lager?'

"They weren't doing a two for one on moisturisers, low fat yogurt or muesli then!!"

Pints of Lager

Beer Club for Men.

"Please feel free to browse."

'And I've teamed that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager.'

"You forgot this! You never go anywhere without wearing lipstick."

I don't want to buy anything. I don't want to upgrade. Watch this! What are you doing? Looking at an ad for the new Mac laptop. My heart's not racing! What's wrong with me?! It is sleek.

Replica Football Merchandise

Ball and Chain

'Don't look at me like that! I know it's a banned substance, OK? But how can I compete if I'm the only one in the league not using spinach?!'

"And THEN, and THIS is the CLEVER bit...We put our advertising logo on the front of all our clothing and make people PAY for the privilege."

'What do you mean foul? I had a shower this morning!'

'I fancy stretching my legs. Could you order the Bitter?'

"I wonder why the kids named me Mourinho? I hope it's not because I'll only last a few days..."

"You just can't accept that I've found someone 'extra special'." Best bitter / Pale Ale / Tennants Very Very Strong Lager.

'Give them lager and sunglasses.'

"Let's hope it's just a mirage."

'All those years you struggled financially, I stood by you. It's my turn for a little piece of the pie.'

'He's got a 'can-do' attitude - look!'

'When did you first become a Fruit-of-the-Loom guys groupie?'