Label Luminary Pillows

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

Lennon and McCartney.

The Hobby Store

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

"Why do people think using big words is a bad thing?"

"Negotiations are at a crucial phase. We're desperately seeking more ways to say 'no'.''

'They call me the 'grandfather' of Hip-Hop!'

Emergency Firebreaker

'The trick is to label straight away, otherwise I forget what I have in my larder...'

Passover Plague

James Russell Lowell

Leonard Cohen.

Lockdown Signpost

Chiantis In Translation

"Welcome to Vanity Workshop. For the next thousand years you're to read out the size labels you've removed from your clothing."

'Then it's agreed. It doesn't have to rhyme.'

Algernon Swinburne

Beet Poet

"I think the lighthouse keeper is having a little fun with us, sir."

Support your local bookstore

Today's lesson: the plague of darkness

"I'm pretty sure the word you've used to describe the new Scrabble isn't allowed."

'I think I may be lactose intolerant.'

Top 10 things to worry about in 2020.

Peanut Butter Warning: Contains Peanuts.

"It takes more to be a super accountant that you were a 'super accountant man' costume."

"The Bolsons are pleased to announce that their daughter, Naomi,is going to take another shot at marriage."

'What the large print giveth, the small print taketh away.'

Corona and the Arts

Isolation playlist

"We're pretty wiped. In one day, we summitted Gucci, Fendi, Comme des Garcon, Louis Vuitton, and Century 21."

"I'm on a special diet; no school food."

'Your luggage was accidentally sent to Singapore, sir, and you're being tried in absentia there for smuggling after-shave lotion.'

'But, what if we break the genetic code and they just CHANGE it?'

"I can take his 1000 watt smile, but his 5000 lumen LED outdoor bright idea lightbulb is too much!"