Lab Nerd T-Shirts

"They're very proud of me. I'm the first in the family to become a bimolecular pharmokinetic integrative-toxicological multiphoton-iagingphenotypic analyst."

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

The Computer Bore

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

Ascent of Machine.

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

WiFi Signals

"I'm an evolution denier. There's no way those people come from us."

"I am not asking for directions."

'How about a toast to my breakthrough?!'

Robot Grabber Arcade Game Machine

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

Naked Mole Rat

Vaccine

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point'. Tennyson.'

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

"Sorry it's late. I got caught in Spring migration."

"Nasty sunburn."

"No son of mine is going into entomology."

"I get the strange feeling this has happened before."

Genetic Fingerprinting.

Free Radicals.

"If we crunch the numbers, it should have zero calories."

"You looked a lot bigger on your dating profile."

Charles Darwin

'I'm growing mini human brains from stem cells.'

"Of course you'll study Latin. How else will you learn the names of your dinosaur friends."