Lab Equipment Collector Pillows

'Better check out what Dr. Figowitz is working on these days.'

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

"Nuts to you, too."

'You know, there's no need to reinvent the rock.'

'Yeah, yeah, yeah... I know the drill.'

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

"So, Bob... anything you'd like to tell me about your little trip to the hunting store on Boxing Day?"

'Hey, we have one of those. You hang your laundry on it.'

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

'Yes, our phones have WIRES attached to them! We're no free-range blabbermouths in this household!'

"And His Majesty sends you a great big kiss, too."

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

"I like wine gadgets more than I like the wine!"

Pencil sharpeners in hell

Hague Convention Defied! Failure of the new Tommy-Scalder.

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'

'It's my latest invention -- I cal lit 'a rock tied to a stick.''

'I meant bring your fishing tackle.'

'We thought you'd like music during your building inspection.'

The Black Hole the National Observatory just discovered, where temporarily misplaced tools and parts go.

"I guess I always wanted to be an electrician. As a little boy, I ran away to join the circuits."

Doubling Gloucester Cheeses

'They say that these are also handy for carrying a sleeping bag, pad, tent, foul weather gear, extra clothes, trail mix...'

DIY Store "I don't know why we come here..."

"For only five dollars more, the guy let me have the 'Smart Hammer.'"

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 2

Jazz Bagpipes

2020

"Have a nice day"