Know-it-all Entertainer Gifts

"No, actually the viola is played more like this."

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"Extreme miming"

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

Any idea how long your family might be visiting?

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

A family trying to make a child smile for a photo

"This one is perfect for Thanksgiving. It comes prestained in cranberry sauce, gravy and pumpkin pie."

'Hurry up you guys! I'm about to serve dinner!'

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

“What if I tell you the card you are thinking of is … the Jack of Hearts ?”

'I'm not sure if he plays that loud because he has a good set of lungs or if it's a mean streak in him.'

Man playing a harmonica on a exercise bike bores customers in a restaurant

Hand Puppets for all ages (Especially 3 or 4).

Pottery Slam

A family choir

"Another helping of pretentiousness, anyone?"

Come dine with me!

Roller Coasters

Thanksgiving Turkey Fortune: "Why the silence?"

'You're having antoher doggie treat party, right?'

'Watch this! Open up a straw by scrunching up its wrapper! Now put a drop of water on that wrinkly paper tube! Check it out! It wiggles and grows!'

Summer holiday activities the whole family will love.

Forcing the Rabbit to Eat the Magicians Hat.

"For your birthday, I got you a food processor!"

'I thought we were going to the zoo too, but look at that red blob there...doesn't it look like a bird? Or a cow?'

Home theatre.

'How did it go at the track today, dear?'

"For the next Christmas party pot luck, let's skip the finger foods."

Children use their dad as a seesaw base.

A cocktail in a tuba

Adult Magician

"Thanks, you've been a great audience. I'm Jerry and I'm here all week."

"Would you like to see my one-woman show about the specials?"

"I don't get it. Who doesn't love a circus?"