Knife Skills Pillows

Cooking School. And what should we always do before chopping our shallots? Have our bandages ready!

Murderous Chef

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

"Harry?... Is that you?"

'Next Please...' (Joe's Sharpening Service).

'This will only hurt for a moment.'

Culinary surgery.

"Now now, what have I told you about using your zombie knife at the dinner table..."

"Don't let it bother you. The doctor told my wife it would keep her mind sharp if she learned a new skill."

Fishing Contest

'We've been picking up your television broadcasts, and we're here to buy some of those neat steak knives!'

A chef uses a giant utensil to chop a tiny sausage.

'We've finished the dishes, Miss. Jenny washes, I wiped, and Susan picked up all the pieces.'

'Women cook to feed the soul...men cook to feed the ego.'

Knife-thrower.

Swiss excalibur...

'Okay, you're not pre-vets anymore....'

Looking Daggers

'You know, sometimes I think we don't even speak the same body language.'

Alfredo the knife thrower's first air trip.

'What is wrong with you, Covington? Larson's sales territory is twice the size of yours, and yet she managed to find the time to learn how to palm a basketball!'

Swizz army knife.

Knife splits newly weds on wedding cake

"Who's going to carve?"

'...open beer bottles with his teeth.'

A Grim Reaper knife thrower not missing his target.

HEAD CHEF - A chef collects the heads of the chefs that rank below him.

'Hmm, you assistant is over here.'

"This is a silencerfor my dagger..."

Surgeons using a Swiss Army Knife.

Dennis's fear of sharp objects was well founded on his recent trip down memory lane."

'I don't know what it is but those tusks would make beautiful knife handles.'