Kitty Counselor T-Shirts

So doctor, what you're saying is that all the time I thought she was a crazy cat lady, it was me who had mental health issues...

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

"Hon, come quick! Mr. Puff has lowered his impenetrable wall of feline indifference, and it probably won't last long!"

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"Have you tried biting him?"

'I get the feeling you're wagging your tale on the outside and crying on the inside.'

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

'Can you give him something to relax his jaws?'

"We're slapping you with a stress suit, pal!"

"Such a refreshing day...I've spent 18 hours between napping and comatose."

"There are no bad dogs. Only good dogs who make bad choices."

'First of all, calm down - your allowed to be on the couch.'

"Petting, fetching, receiving belly rubs . . . It all adds to your billable hours."

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

'Please forgive me for anything I've said or left unsaid.'

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

My Bowl Is Empty.

"Relax - it's just for a few days until they find a place of their own."

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

"And just how long have your felt confined by this 'invisible fence'?"

Before you feed him/After you feed him.

"He doesn't like dinosaurs."

'I think Mr. Teddy's getting too dependent on me.'

Zen Kitten

'Tootsie-pie is going to be spaded, just like Mother.'

The emotional rollercoaster of a Lab

"The thing is we lived in L.A.,...we never even needed mittens!"

'How do you want me to answer that question, Norm? As an attorney, or as your best friend?'

Dog on couch at psychiatrist office talking about love and liver snacks

'Your anger towards us can't be healthy, so we hope this intervention helps.'

'You're allowed up on the couch.'

'The bartender referred me to a shoe shine boy, and the shoe shine boy referred me to you.'