Kitten Kicker Pillows

Cat boxer

"Ninja bread men"

'I don't care if Jackson Pollock did start out this way. We are drawing kittens.'

Okay, start shouting them in for their annual bonuses.

'Champions league'

'Any child left longer than ten minutes past last bell will be given a free kitten.'

'Nice Header, Lauren!'

Cat Boss

'It is now safe to kick and swear at your computer'

Woman welcomes back her cat but not its new kittens.

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

Professional football.

'I bought one and got one free! Best of all, they're both pregnant.'

"It's kittens."

'There's nothing in the rules about gloves.'

'Coffee? Kitten?'

"You're new on catapults aren't you Murphy?"

"Darling, I can't sleep. I mean, what if the kitten should get it into his head to press that button of his?"

"I've been getting the most intense workouts since I taped a picture of my ex on the heavy bag!"

Up, Up, Up, Up....Down, Down, Down, Down...

'I've never seen a healthier kitten. Cuter, most definitely, but never healthier.'

"You're proposing to me with a flea collar?!"

Football

God changes calendar page to a new geologic time period.

'It was built by the ancients as a calendar. We know because each pillar has a kitten doing something really cute carved on it!'

"If the Ref doesn't give that, it's the end of football!"

Kitten Futures

'Love the kitten heels!'

Ballerina Vs. Martial Artist

Life hasn't been the same since Mum took up taekwondo!

'Look, Daddy! - Fluffy begat!'

Cats-can-sell anything advertising agency.

Meow, Meow, Yeow!

'Mr Thurber, come at me like you're going to sexually harass me!'

'I just can't say for certain. They all look the same in those uniforms. ...All I know it that he said he kicks field goals for a living.'