Kitchen Humor Lovers Pillows

Tank vs. Can opener.

Knives Removed From Supermarkets After NZ Terror Attack

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

Wok. Don't Wok.

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

'I was in the catering corps.'

I don't know what happened to the poor guy, but he's visibly shaken.

"I pray that he will enjoy my pie..." "The smell's enough to make me cry!"

Cook and her Maids

'Will I have to be a mum when I grow up?'

'And that's how to make pancakes.'

"I'll bet you're very proud of your handsome, well-behaved little sporks here."

Amy Sedaris

'How do you stop a fish from smelling?'

'Okay, kids...time for your bath.'

When Tia Carmen says... "It's time to eat healthy!" it means... "I'm only using one stick of butter instead of three."

Avocado Timeline

The secret lives of household things.

'He's all eyes!'

"It'll never be ready in time."

"How do you prepare the chicken?"

'Flipping pancakes.' 'Waiting with a net.'

"I couldn't have made my family recipe raisin date nut cake with it's secret ingredient without Jimmy's help."

"We need a new stove. This one's beginning to burn oil."

'Mom! Instant oatmeal is NOT fast food!'

Decaying corpse

'Well, ex-CU-U-Use ME!'

Linda discovers she had just baked the wrong ziti

Pizza with 'Made in China' imprinted on it.

...If sauce has not begun to thicken after 10 minutes, pour contents back into can and wait for your wife to get home.

"Sucker!" / "Stirrer!"