Kitchen Dj Pillows

RAP SCALLION, 'Don't call me no ONION, that ain't my name, I'm BETTA than an onion, but I got no FAME, put me on yo' SAN'wich, put me in yo' SOUP....'

Come dine with me!

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

I could have danced all night!

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

A slice of bread walks a tightrope between slots on the toaster.

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

Soup of the month.

'Big audio gear is coming back!'

"That's it. We’re toast."

Hungry child

'Like death by salad.'

Wok. Don't Wok.

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

"I call it 'rage loaf'."

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

Music to drive ( others mad) to...

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

Benihana style of cooking.

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

"I made you a mixtape."

'I hope you like this, dear. I got the recipe from Gordon Ramses, latest cookery hieroglyphics.'

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

Aqua Filter (frog jumping out).

New music conference

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

'White smoke means she decided what to cook. Black smoke means it's done.'