Kit Collector Pillows

'I swapped shirts with Peter Crouch.'

"This is the new pre-season, post game, after lunch but before 4 PM kit!"

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

New England kit arriving today - "What time's rip-off ?"

"Don't put that on. You're wearing this shirt today."

Bet You Buy This Kit.

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"He built his own airplane from a kit."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

Out of kilter.

'You must be awfully secure in your masculinity.'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'You know, there's no need to reinvent the rock.'

The White House: Some Assembly Required.

'Yeah, yeah, yeah... I know the drill.'

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

"So, Bob... anything you'd like to tell me about your little trip to the hunting store on Boxing Day?"

"Too much club."

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

'And here's the toolkit.'

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

'It's my latest invention -- I cal lit 'a rock tied to a stick.''

"I wonder what this was for."

"You get one every time you order something online."

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'