Kindergarten Wranglers Gifts

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

The Baby Walker

Interior design trends for parents....

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"We've decided your suggestion to have a day care center here at work has merit."

Well, we thought we had childproofed the house

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

"Mom, can you come get me?"

'Whatever surprise he's cooking up for you, I'm sure you've a good sense of humour!'

Toys in the DVD Player.

"I couldn't possibly lick another baby right now."

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

'Beware of teething baby.'

"This is System One and I am holding the beta for System Two."

"Why do small children ask so many questions?" "Why not? We need to learn, don’t we? Anyway it’s no big deal is it? Isn’t that what parents are for? You were probably the same, weren’t you? So why complain?"

'Hey, Mom, here comes Frankie's tailor!'

Climbing with the baby

"I found the perfect summer job! 'Greet people at retail store. Company uniform required. Must be able to carry small children.' How hard can that be?"

Parenting Business Deals

Baby zipping himself up then going to sleep

The First Day Back

'It's your babysitter, where do you keep your fire extinguisher?'

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

Quiet Time

Nanny with children on leash

'Gee, Dad, Mom's getting better at this all the time!'

'You can always tell the pediatricians.'

'They had three puppies and four kids before me: It's almost impossible to find a piece of furniture that hasn't been chewed on...'

A kangaroo mother with a joey in her main pouch and a juice box in a separate smaller pouch.

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

I think these suits have feet in them so we won't leave prints

'I put lint tape all over his onesie so that, as he crawls around, he picks up the dog hair.'

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'