Kid Corraler Gifts

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

Mom on the First Day of School.

The Baby Walker

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

The No No No's

"We've decided your suggestion to have a day care center here at work has merit."

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

"Mom, can you come get me?"

'Whatever surprise he's cooking up for you, I'm sure you've a good sense of humour!'

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

'Here comes the Papa-razzi again...'

"Why do small children ask so many questions?" "Why not? We need to learn, don’t we? Anyway it’s no big deal is it? Isn’t that what parents are for? You were probably the same, weren’t you? So why complain?"

Parenting Business Deals

"I found the perfect summer job! 'Greet people at retail store. Company uniform required. Must be able to carry small children.' How hard can that be?"

"This is System One and I am holding the beta for System Two."

'It's your babysitter, where do you keep your fire extinguisher?'

The First Day Back

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

Quiet Time

Nanny with children on leash

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

"Are you sure they don't include children?"

'You can always tell the pediatricians.'

Babies

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'

'They had three puppies and four kids before me: It's almost impossible to find a piece of furniture that hasn't been chewed on...'

A kangaroo mother with a joey in her main pouch and a juice box in a separate smaller pouch.

RAF plane ride.

"O Holy night - Aye! The stars are brightly shining - YUH!"

"The Day Center called. They say your little girl is resisting arrest."

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey - it's part of the aging process.'

'I think my inner child needs a spanking.'

'If Mom says no, you ask Dad -- it's called the 'checks and balances' system.'

'I'm sure I've forgotten something. I got change from a fifty.'

I'm fed up with cleaning your room! From now on, wipe your feet!