Kick-off King T-Shirts

The Motives of Footballers

...Another second closer to kick-off....another second..

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

'Champions league'

An angry barbecue.

Punishment for the kicker.

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'Nice Header, Lauren!'

'It is now safe to kick and swear at your computer'

"I'm not very scary now, but I will be if I don't get candy."

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

'There's nothing in the rules about gloves.'

"Stimulating this area of the brain will enable the patient to think of all the clever things he wished he had said."

"Quick, Bartlett! Instill them with hope!"

The Knockout.

Cat boxer

'I'm proud of the lads. They show'd a lot of character coming back from one down. . . then two or three silly goals. . . At this level you get punished. But overall I thought we were a bit unlucky. . .'

High Kick

'There's really no need for confusion. Page 95, section 33, paragraph L clearly explains ...'

'Focus on the kick, and forget about all the seven-foot tall kick blockers they have.'

'I just can't say for certain. They all look the same in those uniforms. ...All I know it that he said he kicks field goals for a living.'

"The local karate club must be fund raising again."

"He cost a million pounds, they should've spent another tenner on a pair of glasses."

"We call it that because Pastor Dave is always aware of kick-off time."

"Now I want a clean fight and no head butting."

King vs King- who's the clown?

"I've always feared this day would come. I'm running out of snarky replies."

"I missed a penalty wearing these."

Football

"Son, if you can't say something nice, say something clever but devastating."

'You're the type of young guy we're looking for - aggressive, willing to take chances, able to bounce back...how'd you like to go into banking?'