Keyboard Shortcuts Explorer T-Shirts

"Since you called me 50 times in a row, I assumed it would be something more important than how to make a smiley face using your keyboard."

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

Piano Recital

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

"I'm still pre-literate."

'Ooo! The dog food sounds good! ... mind you, I always have that at home.'

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

"Well I wouldn't eat it, but don't let that put you off."

"Anything but milk and cookies."

"With this company, it's like 'Adventure Capital."

"Keep up the good work, whatever it is, whoever you are."

'Whatever he's eating.'

Coffee Menu

"...L...uh, M...uh Q...how come there are so many darn letters in the alphabet anyway?"

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

Coffee

'The customer is always right...'

Pizza with Extra Extra Cheese.

'Hard or soft science?'

"Nothing is organic, local or sustainable. Now, can we get started?"

Heart Disease Menu

Body Systems

"You want organic, we'll make it organic."

'Are you ready to be patronised yet?'

'Cook is a musician. Improvises. Never makes the same thing twice.'

Computer Music

Pizza with 'Made in China' imprinted on it.

'Your training will be the next five minutes watching my fingers move at the speed of light.'