Kebab King Gifts

Vlad the Impaler - The Later Years.

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

Counting ribs

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

"Where do we put Desserts?"

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"I'm not growling, it's my stomach rumbling!"

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

"Where the hell's my Slinky?"

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

"Eventually the instrument becomes an extension of your body."

'Honey, I'm home - for good.'

The Unhappy King

An Advance Visit From The Three Wise Men

'Good news from the field, sire! Attila did not like the referee's call, so he's folding up his tents, taking his ball and going home!'

'Not gruel, stupid! -- I said find the GRAIL!'

"So are you can't cook or won't cook?"

The Royal Wii

The Work-from-Home-Polka

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

'I cut myself slashing the budget!'

Everybody forgot his jubilee.

'You might want to try another photographer, Sire. This one tends to cut the heads off.'

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

(Mother Goose: playboy's Mirthful Master of the Macabre serves Up Some Strange Twists On a Clutch of Children's Classics.) "Is this supposed to be somebody's idea of a joke?"

A war would have been bad enough, but losing Alsace-Lorraine in a poker game?

'Could you scoot your chair over this way a little dear?'

'In my experience, life is good most of the time, but come the holidays, they look at me as if I'm a nuisance...'

'You can scratch your back when the war is over!'