Judicial Critique T-Shirts

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

"Well....I could've done this!"

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

"Where is everyone?" "You had 'everyone' killed." "Stalin family reunion"

Truth

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

'Nice, but it needs more angst.'

"I like it, honey ... it speaks to what a waste of time your MFA was."

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

"I think I'm as patient as the next person, but my husband wouldn't stop saying 'yo,' so I shot him."

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

Equal Justice Is An Illusion

"The subaqueous qualities of the biomorphic forms spacially undermine the larger metaphorical resonance of the mark-making."

"He's left out the staples"

Disappearing Democracy

"Your honor, I intend to put the system on trial."

"Can you hear me now?"

"Not guilty"

Cop Shop/Fake evidence/Plant now for spring.

"Objections overruled...I also think the defendent looks extremly dodgy"

'I bet this is going to be another round of criminal bashing, isn't it?'

'I was afraid cameras in the court would lead to this.'

'I can't tell the kitch from the schlock any more.'

Tilted painting

"Apparently he only uses fugitive colours."

"Not guilty by virtue of reasonable doubt."

'The artist did this one during his 'I've got no idea' - period.'

"Is this 'pollocks'."