Jovial Monk Friend Gifts

Om and Ommer

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

"It's ok -- It's the Enlightenment Channel."

History of Cartooning.

"I'm going on a retreat."

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

"If we could all turn to page 387, turn off your iPods and repeat after me?"

Monk and Bible and Devil Page Marker

Running shoes? You have the wrong idea about "fasting," Brother Ernest!

"They always fall for the old 'high-impact yoga' trick!"

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

'I invited God to be one of my friends on Facebook and he's turned me down!'

'How do we know YOU'RE not bearing false witness?'

A monk illuminating a book with quill pen

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

Computer literate Monk

Golf

"O.K., God – please delete everything I said today."

Pray as you Go.

Sports Day at the Monastery

'Today's sermon is from St. Matthew, Chapter Five....'

'My opinion, right or wrong!'

'Listen, pal, Happy Hour was over ten minutes ago.'

A monk watches TV in his zen garden.

'I keep mine on my IPod.'

Rin Tin Zen.

"All of my manifestations are currently busy however your prayer is important to me so please..."

"I'm going on a retreat."

"You must lose your attachments."

'Actually I'm meditating on a bizarre anime that I saw last night.'

No caption. (Friar wears a cross and the chord leads to his ears as it does with a MP3 player.)

"I don't care what they do, as long as they don't mess with the thirty-two-ounce martini."