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Off the wall legal advisor.

Leonard L. Lipchitz: Sending the Law since 1972

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

"I'll go to my room and do my homework, but I want time and a half."

"I'll get my 10,000 steps in tonight!"

Family doing circus trick heading to the circus.

Doctor to patient: 'I won't be asking about your three marriages. This isn't an invasive procedure.'

Celebration in operating theatre.

'My client stands before you, a jury of his whittling peers ...'

"What the... an apple?! Hey, I can make schnapps out of it and if you've had plenty of it, gravity pulls you to the ground!"

'How do we know YOU'RE not bearing false witness?'

"OK, I'll tell you what I know, but I can't reveal my source."

"It's important to learn numbers. Then you can have a pin number and get money from ATMs."

Artist angry at jogger running through his painting.

"So, is it like a foursome then, miss?"

Going Shopping Together.

"Tell me more about these abandonment issues."

'You called for tech support?'

"Ted wants to bring the fan back into accounting"

hoovering husband

"I was very good...delicious in fact."

'Dear Customer - Due to economic cutbacks, this year we have produced a 'Round Robin' Christmas Card...'

Enthusiastic man

Why did you think the prenup lawyer gave me such a good deal?

'Pinky swear doesn't cut it anymore. My attorney has a few documents for you to sign.'

'Let's play Doctor - You be the patient, you be the surgeon, and I'll be the mal-practice attorney.'

Technically Speaking

"Doctor! This is not the time for the 'pull my finger' gag!"

"Look Fred, are you going to play, or are you just going to clown around?"

'Doreen's been all over me to paint the house and Phillip wouldn't stop bugging me for a new trampoline, so...'

'Good news. Even though you've been spending way beyond your means, the IMF is giving you a bailout. It seems you're too big to fail.'

Does your good modd get on everybody's nerves? Get brought down by a grouch pro an be popular again!

"Age, nothing - I'd be satisfied to play my weight"

'When I said address the ball I didn't mean like that!'