Journal Jotter Pillows

"Today no one, and I mean no one, could get the sneakers out of my mouth..."

'It's a diary and guaranteed for one year.'

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

"Why is it always me that has to get up just as I'm falling asleep to do things I forgot."

"Are all Brits bisexual, or just the ones who publish their diaries?"

Replacement Bus Spotters.

Stationers' sign leaking ink onto a passer-by.

'Your night writing book, madam.'

'Sorry, but we're not compatible, Jim. You keep a diary, and I blog on the Internet.'

The Paper Route

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

"Dear Diary: Today I ate, groomed, napped. Ate, groomed, napped. Ate, groomed, napped ... HAIRBALL!!"

"I think I'll keep a diary..."

James decided to stay in that night.

Child writes letter to Santa reading 'Sorry Santa, I DO want to go to school'.

Professional woman in pub

"It's from the children. They'd like us to let them in."

"I'm taking detailed notes of everything, so I can tell my kids what things were really like when I was their age."

Fountain pen coming out of a man's head.

"Expedition log #57: Like the rest of the week, I expect today will be another uneventful day."

'Two men having a sword fight with large pen and pencil.'

Found pearls! No way I'm leaving. . . Amelia.

"How do you spell, asteroid?"

A man on a desert island writes 'Have a nice day' in glass bottles repeatedly.

'Lost Diary'

Colin kept a notebook by his bed to write down any ideas he had during the night... "Genulph hyu donkey slapperthwaite."

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

"I'd never have known the joys of a journal if my attorney hadn't insisted I keep one."

'Day 57. The tigers appear to be adjusting to my presence.'

A Court Reporter's Pocket Knife

You are not forgotten!

"What was the point of writing a blog that nobody else could read?"