Journal Jotter Prints

"Today no one, and I mean no one, could get the sneakers out of my mouth..."

'It's a diary and guaranteed for one year.'

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

"Why is it always me that has to get up just as I'm falling asleep to do things I forgot."

"Are all Brits bisexual, or just the ones who publish their diaries?"

Replacement Bus Spotters.

Stationers' sign leaking ink onto a passer-by.

'Your night writing book, madam.'

"Dear Diary: Today I ate, groomed, napped. Ate, groomed, napped. Ate, groomed, napped ... HAIRBALL!!"

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

'Sorry, but we're not compatible, Jim. You keep a diary, and I blog on the Internet.'

What've you been up to since college, Lemont? Oh, I became a journalist … had a kid, blah blah … but I wanna hear about you, Rudy. Grigori Rasputin. How've you been all these years? How's your Uncle Mort? Are you a Russian spy? Boop boop boop. How'd that stomach-tumble-translator startup you founded in the nineties go? Wait ... what did you say you became? What do they have on President Trump? How's your cat? Boop.

The Paper Route

"I think I'll keep a diary..."

James decided to stay in that night.

Child writes letter to Santa reading 'Sorry Santa, I DO want to go to school'.

Professional woman in pub

'Two men having a sword fight with large pen and pencil.'

A man on a desert island writes 'Have a nice day' in glass bottles repeatedly.

Dear Dairy

Quadruple dark hot chocolate. Whoa, everything all right? Sure, yeah, great. I'm a journalist and writer in an era in which the printed word has been totally devalued by free distribution of information on the internet. Can I pay in prose? Point taken.

Found pearls! No way I'm leaving. . . Amelia.

"How do you spell, asteroid?"

Fountain pen coming out of a man's head.

'Lost Diary'

Today's alpha-lesson is "Keep a journal." The average person lets life pass them by. The events of their lives fade into nothingness. An alpha knows that long after they're gone, their thoughts and experiences will be of great interest to historians. That's not an original thought. I read it in the papyrus Randus Maximus XIV left in a safe deposit box after he helped conquer Judea.

"Expedition log #57: Like the rest of the week, I expect today will be another uneventful day."

"I'm taking detailed notes of everything, so I can tell my kids what things were really like when I was their age."

"It's from the children. They'd like us to let them in."

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

Colin kept a notebook by his bed to write down any ideas he had during the night... "Genulph hyu donkey slapperthwaite."

"I'd never have known the joys of a journal if my attorney hadn't insisted I keep one."

'Day 57. The tigers appear to be adjusting to my presence.'

A Court Reporter's Pocket Knife