Jolly Humorist Pillows

The Dangers of being at the back of the team during an emergency stop became all too obvious to poor old Blitzen.'

'It appears he hit an iceberg.' (A LETTUCE)

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

Fleas Navidad.

"Merry Christmas"

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

Mr Claus, tests indicate your blood is 95% milk and cookies.

Daffodil bulbs

Father Christmas uses laptop on roof. Man says: 'I think someone is stealing our wi-fi.'

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

"I've had. . . um. . . just a small sherry. . ."

I think he's joking. "Placebo" can't be a real medical science term. It sounds like a funny name for a clown.

Why are you insisting on spending Christmas in hospital, Gran? I prefer the Santa here, darling.

'Apparently our postcode qualifies us for Government sponsored loft insulation.'

Men dancing

Snowman throws snowball at Santa.

Elf of the Month

"Listen, the first pterodactyl of spring."

"Maybe this year..."

Surreal Ale Pub.

'Vacuums!'

'What do you expect? A red bulb burned out, and you're free till Christmas.'

"Nice try, Frank. Mother is still coming for the weekend."

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

Santa Claus stuck in a chimney sitting in a hospital emergency room.

Santa Claus writes a 'Yule Blog'.

'Your dad only works one day a week but mine only works ONE day a year!'

Just Survived My 3rd COVID Scare Dance.

'Hey,mom-have you seen my pet frog?'

C is for Cracker

'But seriously, folks... Who knows how many blondes it takes to screw in my latest invention?'

After talking one stranger to death, Velma starts in on the next.

'Okay Dad, time to unwind.'