Joking Enthusiasts Pillows

"The way I look at it, drinking alcohol may never solve anything. . . but neither did drinking milk!"

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

"Why do they do that?"

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

Zoology Class. Test Today. What did you get for the question about Fuzzy Wuzzy?

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

What's normal?

"Well, I'm thinking about boarding school. Though I'm not sure they accept adults."

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

"They're comfortable."

"The tests confirms you have short-term memory loss."

'I'm keeping a scrap book. All I've got so far is one umbilical cord.'

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

Stairlift around cliff face.

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

Man enters a palm reading establishment carrying a tropical plant.

God not-too-happy with the Humans sticking a 'Closing DOWN Sale!' sign on planet Earth

"Someone throw him a punchline!"

'I said you're next, Hibblemeyer. . . Hibblemeyer!'

"She wishes to range free!"

"I always check twitter before work, to see if yesterday's joke got me the sack."

Clown's Comedy Fart.

"Yeah, I don't like this part either."

The First Fire Stick

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Twenty Six

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

"Eat me"

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'