Joking Around With Friends Gifts

'Hank, you've got food on your face. No, no, other side.'

"Hmmmm...I think I can see the problem."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

Children disturbing a heart rate reading.

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

"I want to dispel the rumor that this redistricting map was drawn by my toddler on an Etch-A-Sketch. . .I'd never met that toddler before."

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

Get crazy once in a while

"I brought you a wig because you said you like long hair."

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

'You've got the wrong idiot, number.'

Caution May Contain Nuts.

Pesky students.

"Just toot my horn and I'll be there."

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

'Our family has a dry sense of humor, and we don't laugh that much.'

At the mobile tracking test lab.

'You're one of my kids? Really? I'm so sorry, I have so many it's hard to remember them all...'

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

Bottle-nosed Dolphins.

'Half o' mild and a bag of pork scratchings - you're grooming me, aren't you?'

Giraffe wanders into Lion country.

"So yeah - This is my ideal first date."

A Young Boy Talking To An Old Gentleman.

"You've got to be kidding me." Hoover Dam

'Just remember, he's bigger, but you're funnier. As soon as he starts laughing, you've got him!'

Extremely Practical Jokes.

"The witness will confine his 'Knock knock' answers to 'Who's there?'"

Bishop has his robes stuck in his pants.

"Sometime I feel people go out of their way just to scare me."