Joining A Company Gifts

'Well, I suppose the kid has just joined the company...'

"Welcome to the company, Barnes. All we have to do now is mark you with our brand."

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

A fight in the Boardroom.

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to far, go together." - African proverb.

'I blame the nothing for something culture.'

"So far it doesn't look like a hostile takeover."

"I hope you're good, Charlie. I've only played a couple of times."

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

"It's strictly business. Please don't take your financial ruin personally."

"Providing great customer care is of course important, but shall we start with how you manage forms TG-45S through to NSD-89b."

'I think we're setting the bar too low.'

'There's a gentleman out here with $643 million. He would like to discuss a takeover.'

'The Human Right Act bans ANY cruel or unusual treatment...we may need to rewrite our ENTIRE customer care policy!'

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

'I'm confident that with the right mix of role-playing exercises and prescription medication we'll make a cohesive team.'

"I always cry at mergers."

'Massive unpredictability is absolutely certain, maybe.'

"Welcome."

'The buildings are merging.'

"We're a family here and you'll be like a son to me - illegitimate, of course."

'You seem young, Perkins. Why, I bet I was incarcerated before you were even born.'

'Cards for all occasions: takeover, buyouts, mergers, flotation, bankruptcy.'

"...and remember son. Don't let anybody push you around!"

'First, I'd like to welcome the presidents of the two internet networking companies that just merged with us.'

'Do you think you can turn the company around without making us all dizzy?'

'You can't cash your paychecks until your 6 month probation is satisfactorily over.'

"The new boss might seem severe, but he won't bite your head off!"

"Just great...on my first day on the job."

"This is my first day. I don't have any yet."