Job Hopper Club Member Pillows

"I've been fired from my last five jobs."

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

"I've got those 'Don't worry about me, I'll just be here, all alone' blues."

Clubbing

"I'm good at ticking boxes."

"The only thing worse than being unemployed is having a job."

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

"The last time I was in Europe was 4 boyfriends ago..."

'What else do you have going for you besides being aggressive?'

"I've been an accountant, an actuary, an advertising exec, an administrator, an architect, an art director, and an auditor, and now I'd like to move on to the B's."

"You're one of the short termed employed. You're out of here tomorrow."

"I can handle a wide variety of work. In fact I've had ten different jobs in four months."

"This poem was written at a time in my life when I wrote a poem."

"I see by your resume, you don't stay in one place long."

'He made me jump through hoops, but I got the job...'

'I heard you got a job at that new club. It must be great."

Bouncer.

"I've been dying to hit the dance floor in a crowded nightclub."

Two man congratulating a 'Jazz club' "Real Cool" and "Real Hot"

"That's not all I do. Actually I'm a psychological counselor- gymnast-motivational speaker-relaxation therapist-sex worker."

Too much ambition results in promotion to a job you can't do.

"I'm leaving my job so that I can spend time with another job."

'We have an opening for a receptionist and a sales person and I'm ready to quit. How are you at multitasking?'

'When I grow up I', going to be an electrical engineer and when I'm laid off, I'm going to go into real estate and when that goes down the tube, I'm going to go into . . . '

"I'll be right back. If you need anything, just holler."

"I'm leaving Friday and we are all going to the club after work. Will you come?"

'Actually, we're members of a mountain climbing club named for sir Edmund Hillary.'

'The nightlife around here? Pretty boring if you ask me Dude: My parents are awake...'

"I like my job. It keeps me alive."

Comedians believe there is a future in laughter.

Beer goggles, whiskey binoculars and absinthe telescope.

"Chasing, digging, rolling, fetching. . . have you no experience doing absolutely nothing at all?"