Job Frustration Gifts

'Thank you for calling Tech Support. Your computer is one month old. We no longer support that model. Good day.'

'I don't know how much more of this I can take!'

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

Tangled Earphones Support Group.

Career Analyst "Well I've looked at your file and yes, your job is rubbish"

'I used to be an accountant but I found it too depressing.'

I can read this audit, but HOW should I read it...What is my MOTIVATION, how do I bring these figures to life,make them sing!... Colin often wondered whether accountancy had been the right career choice for him

"Just pick one!! We're already late!!"

'Make your wishes, but I can't promise anything regarding jobs.'

"After giving them the runaround for five minutes, pass them on to anger management."

'Another day another dollar Maurice, but boy do I hate kids!'

"She's always like this at this time of the month,short tempered, insecure,anxious,questioning why she does the job!" "PMT?" "Wageslip!"

'I started out as one of the good guys but I hated it.'

"Instead of a holiday party, the boss gave us a coupon for a burger at the drive-thru."

"Honey, can you bring me a drink? I had the worst day. That promotion I was telling you about? They gave it to a mallard. Can you believe it? A mallard!"

I don't see a future for me in my present job. They don't reward mediocrity.

"No, my list of productivity enhancements doesn't include `leave for another company'."

Patience Tested While You Wait.

Self Checkout

"Yes, I know what's going on in the world. That's still no excuse for my Internet being down all day."

Anger Management - Now Treating Fuel Price Rage.

'Here at A.T.G. Inc, we recognize hard work... and maybe someday we'll reward it.'

"The instructions must be hard to understand, because along with the number to customer service, it also has a number to an anger management counselor."

"I'm going to put you on hold for a few minutes...to see if you totally lose it."

After standing on the scales Claire decided to stamp on the diet book.

Struggling with unwilling computers.

"Miss Widlington, I've failed in life, send in someone for me to blame."

'We can't promote you to partner, but I will teach you our secret handshake.'

"I can always tell when there's something on Ferguson's mind."

'Next, they'll be taking our jobs.'

"Have you tried doing the thing you just told me you tried?"

'What's this bank charge of £35?'

"If you are angry at being kept on hold, press 1, if you are furious press 2, if you are apoplectic with rage ..."

The Career Cowboy