Jigsaw Philosopher Gifts

"We should start a church where we only read the parts of the bible that are never read in church."

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

'There goes another one. Galileo, don't you have any idea what makes them do that?'

"Cool, jigsaw box!"

'How did he make the world in six days?'

"Just how many ways are there to skin a cat?"

Irritable Vowel Syndrome

'Since you're a teacher, we picked this one from the Tree of Knowledge.'

Free love

The Meaning of Life

Rudy, is there life after battery life? I don't understand, Doug 2.0. If we have made our last computation, if our processor has expired. Do we ascend to some other network, a place without pop-ads and spam? Are you sick, Doug 2.0? Are you dying? Negative. It has contracted a terrible, irreversible virus. Oh! Your laptop has died and you want to know if it's going to heaven. Will it look down on me and still track my movements? How a geek mourns.

"Try to fit in, Dear."

'Sounds like another sat nav mistake, you had better put the kettle on dear!'

"I guess when you run out of Tooth Fairy teeth, you gotta go get a job!"

'I'm just not sure he fits in.'

'I bet he can run twice as fast as you can.' 'But he has twice as many legs!'

U. S. POST OFFICE, ''Fragile'? Yeah, yeah, pal -- they're all fragile.'

"Man...I just finished this jigsaw puzzle in four hours and it said three to six years on the box!"

The Birth of Philosophical Thought Experiments.

'When I was ready to read, they taught me to tie my shoes - when I was ready to tie my shoes, they taught me to read.'

Well, I think we know who wears the pull-ups in that relationship.

That's where we're different. I see the toilet bows half-full, and you see the toilet bowl half-empty.

'There's only one piece left. C'mon, we can figure this out.'

It was the day Malcolm found God.

"Done already? Wow!" "Yup, a new record. Just under two years."

"You do the Hokey Pokey and you turn yourself around. That's what it's all about."

Jigsaw Puzzles, Inc. Personnel. You life is falling to pieces. You're perfect for us!

"Pawn to King Four."

"You're not the 'love 'em and leave 'em' type, are you?"