Jfk Fan Pillows

'My proposed legislation is based on the concept that 'a rising tide lifts all boats.''

"You're on a what?!"

Turkish Democracy

Drink for me and my hot mamma. Now! We don't serve beer. Latte. Two, punk! Decaf. You don't want to see him angry. Also, low-foam and soy milk would be great. You don't want to see him gassy. Can I get one of those little Twizzler sticks to stir it with? Cube of brown sugar, please. And one nonfat blueberry scone! Two! I'd like to see how John Wayne would've ordered a fancy coffee drink.

"They're SUPPOSED to have a disparate impact!"

Kangaroo - Mum dropping her ice-cream on Joey's head.

A Little Extra

'Henry was an undecided voter four years ago when he entered that voting booth, and I'm still waiting for him to decide and come home.'

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

Forensic evidence now proves that the shots in the balcony weren't meant for the President, but rather the show's cast.

Batman tissue dispenser.

'Oh, I'm just writing a tender memoir or my long ago affair with J.F.K...it's filled with pathos and sad wishful longing...'

Football Delivery

Barak Obama on the Globe

"The Equal Opportunity people say I can't call you my sidekick any more. You're now my personal assistant."

US recommendation for Middle East peacemaking.

Jenga!!!

Abraham Lincoln

'I guess you're not from around here. In this region of the country football is in the religion section.'

A heat wave threatens an old woman.

Theodore Roosevelt wins the Nobel Peace Prize.

'Heretofore unnoticed resemblance between G. Washington and A. Lincoln'

"Just how powerful of a fan did you put in your computer?"

George W. Bush

Reagan on Mt. Rushmore.

Obama holding up the earth

Self - toppling

Greek Crisis

"Sometimes I question his priorities."

Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

I hope Bernie Sanders wins. We've never had a president like him. We've had cool presidents, awkward presidents, dignified presidents, goofy presidents

"Mr. Speaker, I would like to request an additional thirty seconds to approach my esteemed colleague from across the aisle and punch him the face."

"So. . . no, you are not going to root for another team."

The End of Economic Stimulus is Near!

Biden Wins