Jester Of Economics Pillows

'My nephew suggest that we beg Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny to solve the crisis. Childish, eh? Would you please find out these guys' phone numbers?'

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

"Can you change this quiz grade from an A to a C? I like to keep expectations low until I blow my parents' mind by acing the final exam."

''C-minus'? ??" Do you know how long it took me to find and download this term paper?'

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

"That new drug causes flatulence."

"Nous somme desir-eh, go, er, allez, erm, universitaire français, s'il vous plait."

"Political Science... that's in the Department of Performing Arts."

"We're counting on you to reverse this trend before this afternoon's investors meeting."

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

The burden of carrying the Euro.

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

'Instead of jail time, our head of finance chose the stock option.'

"We need a market icon that reflects the ridiculous market conditions..."

'Wait a minute....!

I'm doing poorly, but that's without performance enhancing drugs.

"I don't consider a missing four million dollars to be 'monkeyshines'."

'All right, gentlemen, this is the current picture of our growth industry!'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

"You gave us quite a scare there Mr. Edwards! We thought we lost your credit card information."

Investments.

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

"I've deregulated Arthur, but he still doesn't run very efficiently."

A collective sigh of relief.

"Those eco-terrorists are going to cost us a FORTUNE!!"

"We bring him gifts of gold, frankincense and mercantile mutual hedge fund options."

"Now, where was I?"

'I'm a 100% consistent investor. I buy bonds when I should buy stocks when I should buy bonds.'

'Dear sir, every month we place all bills in a big pile on the table, and select six at random for payment...'

'I bet he gets a better rate of interest than me!'

Money down the drain.

'Wouldn't it be easier if the banks simply merged with the Inland Revenue?'

Greece Bowing Before Angela Merkel