Japanese Cinema Lover Gifts

'I've been lying to you, darling. I'm not really Godzilla, King of the Monsters...'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

Wife: 'Ah, honey.....why are you covered in raw fish and rice?' Husband: 'Oh I was running late for the 6:15 and got on a darn sush train by mistake!'

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"What's he going to do now, break wind?"

Godzillla eating people using telephone poles as chopsticks.

"Bloody hell!"

"Gone with the wind with cats" "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." "Me neither, who cares—let's take a nap."

"Housekeeping?!"

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"

"The Eggsorcist"

Mikado

"...You talking to me? Well, I'm the only one here... You talking to me?!" "Narcissus De Niro"

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'I have a feeling we are not in Kansas anymore.'

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

My parents ate New York and all I got was this stupid t-shirt

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

"I'm sick of watching the same movie every day."

Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, in all the solar systems, in all the galaxies, in all the universe, she walks into mine.

'Oh, nothing, just babysitting the Lord of the Rings.'

Star Wars Audience

"You funnin' me, bub?"

"So is this war movie rated R, rated PG, or rated RPG?"

'Sean Connery was the best James Bond!'

Kirsten Johnson

'How's this new concept? Instead of a gunfight, the hero overpowers the villian with a heartfelt homily on the sanctity of family values.'

Tom Hanks