Jailbreaker At Heart T-Shirts

It's not what you think. I got caught because I left a paper trail.

Mort Park! You mean Killer. You're sprung, Killer. I'm free to go? Unless you're so tough now you'd rather stay. I mean a guy named Killer probably likes jail. Mail me my blanky.

I'm worried about Uncle Mort. He's still in jail for refusing to reveal his secret source? Not just that. It's his relationship with Sadie. I feel like … What? She says she wants him back, but I'm not sure. Why would you say something like that? Your sweetie made you a saw with a cake in it. Oooh.

"Pregnant!... How did that happen? We took precautions, like not having sex!"

Well, I don't know who sent it and quite frankly, Marilyn, I don't care. I only know that we're about to taste sweet freedom, baby.

'Where did I bury the loot? -- I thought you buried the loot!'

"I stole me a pot of gold. That's how I became a Lepre-CON."

"Mr. Caldwell comes to us from a minimum-security correctional facility in Pennsylvania."

'My lawyer will get us out of here. This is a clear breach of human rights.'

Ronnie 'the chameleon' waits for a break in the traffic, before making his break for it...

Sweet Jailbreak

"Carl! I thought I'd find you here."

'Hey! Kid in the blue! Where'd you get that BEER?'

"Psst. Pass it on. Tonight's the break!..."

'You're the one who called for a locksmith?'

"And just the name alone: 'feral parakeets'... I mean, how cool is that?"

The trouble with trying to quit smoking.

'Hey! †I thought we were going to make our own rules!'

"Wanna join my hangouts circle?"

Desert Island Inmate

'Oh my lord, they've turned into pillows!'

At his jailbreak, Bob rummaged through grit, sand loam and unfortunately and unintentionally through several dimensions.

"Today on the Godcast, what if I told you 'commandments' were more like 'suggestments?'"

Kissing ban.

'Look on the bright side -- we could still be in the MARKET.'

"What's your exit strategy?"

"In the movie about the New York prison escapees, I'd like to see Jack Nicholson as Richard Matt and Woody Harrelson as David Sweat."

Prisoner on the run - tread mill.

'Sir, are you regurgitating food from outside the theater?'

Full moon brings out werewolf in prison cell

'I had the cops all bribed, but I completely forgot about the stupid superheroes!'

"You guys go ahead—I'm an inside cat."

'Here comes the warden. Let's see you try to dance your way out of this one.'

"I found your contact lens."

"Cancel all hunger strikes."