Island Survival Fan Pillows

"Dang. If I'd known help was coming I wouldn't have eaten Ted."

Message in a bottle marked 'return to sender'.

'Dear Diarrhea, Day 84. Well, I'm constipated again today...'

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

"Ticket and passport, please."

Ted did have some concerns about the appearance of nepotism.

Emergency Pants

Dear Diary, 36 weeks on this island and I'm starting to feel that I'll never get rescued."

Tsunami Evac Route

Shipwrecked Ventriloquist.

'I so wish we had found the shears in the shipwreck...'

"I've never been this excited about an anal probe before!"

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

"I'm starting up a concierge medicine practice. You in?"

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

"Dig deep! C'mon! You got this!"

"Graveyards always put me ill at ease."

After 73 days, the coconut would finally be his.

"It looks like a pitch for a survival-themed reality show."

Need tickets.

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

A man on a desert island has an inbox and outbox both filled with sand.

Desert island has bottle bank and paper bank. Castaway sees message in bottle float towards island.

"Now that we've fermented coconut milk, so we build a boat or a tiki bar?"

'I know you're doing your best, but I'm getting awfully tired of cream of coconut soup.'

"No, I don't wanna read your damn blog."

'What luck!'

Artificial intelligence trying to make it on its own.

"What if I told you that everything you knew about slowly going insane on a desert island was wrong?"

"Now you can send it."

'I wonder how many board feet are in this tree.'

"I hope that you're not refusing free dental care for ideological reasons."