Ironic Prayer Warrior Pillows

"You haven't responded to any of my texts, tweets, or snapchats so I'm trying the old-fashioned way..."

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'Please make us instruments of Thy peace, starting with Bucky Sims.'

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

Monk Prompt

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

'Bless this food we are about to receive, all except the broccoli. Bless the apple pie twice.'

Praying mantis.

'I'm just going to say my prayers. Any requests?'

Nun Binning the Devil

"Are our prayers answered whether we have an iphone or an android?"

'I guess you've noticed that most of these trespasses are reruns.'

Kid praying: 'If it's okay with you, don't record this one.'

"I hope you don't mind, but I stuck in a little prayer for General Motors."

Child praying - asks god to bless his family and the new motorbike he's bought with his father's credit card.

Minister Starts at a New Church

"Wake up! Brother Billy's finished praying."

"What do I click on after I say 'Amen'?"

"Bob, you've been warned before. You can't come to prayer just to gather gossip material."

'This is the one - we want you to pray for this one.'

Holy phone

"You don't have to worry about using up your minutes."

Man prays: 'Lord help me to be humble, and I want that by 10am Monday.'

'This is the Rabbi's favourite.'

'God Bless Momma, and Daddy and Fluffy...'

And cut down on the praying if you want the housemaid's knee to go...

"Say the whole prayer, none of this et cetera, et cetera..."

'That's all for tonight, God. Stay tuned.'

Husband to kneeling wife: 'Praying for a snow day is great, Martha, except that we live in Boca Raton.'

'Perhaps you need a more reverent prayer than, 'Come on, God, help me out.'

Young child saying grace

The Force of Example.