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Oliver Goldsmith.

"Feel free to take notes."

"Happy St Patrick’s Day"

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

Neptune

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

A Witch Consults Her Magic Mirror

"Tell us again about the humpback of Notre dame."

"Sorry kids, wrong house. This one is made of vegetables."

"Sorry Darling, you are fabulous, but I'm searching for MY Prince too!"

'Gee, I just never get tired of this!'

James Joyce.

Mad Hatter's tea party.

Triumphant mouse posing like Perseus holding aloft Medusa's head.

"Come in, minion."

Don Quixote knocking over a propeller.

Three Little Pigs in a Cyclone

"He is stingy. If he is giving gold it's only because prices have hit rock-bottom..."

"What is it with Garrison Keillor and rhubarb pie?"

marionette

Freia and the apples of eternal youth

'It's a knight in British army issue shining armour' - Knight in string vest and underpants

'Nowadays kiddo, we just need to herd the sheep, but my grandfather had to protect them from wolves!'

"Try and stop me if you’ve heard this one before …"

"That isn't allowed either."

Charles Dickens

Alexander Pushkin

Tarnhelm

'It's from Goldilocks's lawyer. Apparently, she's suing us because she burnt her mouth on the hot porridge.'