Iou Issuer T-Shirts

"Oops...nothing but IOUs I never paid back!"

'I love the name. Now that we've gone public, what do you think we ought to do?'

Money pouring in for a 'Acme Doodad Company's IPO.

"Our initial public offering, .... The public has gotten wind of it!"

Cat Seance

'Someday, son, 50 of this will belong to your ex-wife,'

The ROI on social media was not yet optimized.

'Still no money, but a lot more IOU's than usual!'

"Let me make this perfectly opaque..."

It says, Did you know you can now call up any spirit for just 10

Help! Bought IPOs with IOUs.

'I like it!'

Lady to tombstone: 'Sam, I invested all of your money in an IPO last week ... we're millionaires!'

"If you believe, clap your hands. Don't let our IPO die!"

"The equities markets loves me, the equities markets love me not. . ."

'I was a lawyer for a start-up tech company, taking my pay in stock, and after they went public, I retired at age 26!'

'Our research department analysts always expect tech stock to move higher, but they don't know which ones or when.'

Ukraine Crisis

When can you get rid of the crutches? Doctor says now, lawyer says not yet.

"Sam I invested all of your money in an IPO last week .. we're millionaires!"

Evacuation Route.

"If the I.P.O. foes well, I'll be able to move out of my parents' basement."

'Just to clarify IOU's do not qualify as a tithe!'

"Help!"

"Google glasses, I remember those. I wonder why they never caught on?"

Any safety features?

The World as A Christmas Pudding With A dynamite Candle

In the current economy, I'm afraid I'm going to have to reduce the size of your allowance, Axel. You haven't given me any money in eons. I meant the size of your IOUs.

"Is the Dude in?"

"Smith, insurance co. According to our algorithms you should have died two years ago. Sorry, but algorithms don't have any sense of humour."

'No we do not pay in advance.'

Warning Coronavirus

Guardian Angel Orientation. Guardian angels are constantly on duty. You'll be binge-watching over!