Invoice Aficionado Gifts

'Please don't use a cartoon font and emoticons when you prepare overdue account statements. We don't want to send the wrong message.'

Abraham Lincoln sends his first bill - Three score dollars and ten.

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"I know other hospitals are worried about the superbug, but ours is the only one that understands the accounts system."

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

Corporate Whore.

Female business.

"Ah yes, I know this bit...it's from the advert!"

"....and then it turned out that the e-mail I ignored that I got from the Nigerian bank offering me £200 million was REAL!"

Roads with a view.

Desk shaped like an office block.

"I'll have your check in a moment, sir."

"The x-rays came back, and — I'm sorry, but we found a very large attachment."

'He was always too busy to sit for his portrait.'

"Hi..just ringing to see if you got my e-mail?"

'Dear sir, every month we place all bills in a big pile on the table, and select six at random for payment...'

"Not succinct or to the point Ambrose...just how we like it!"

Your Ad Here.

"Pastor, since you refuse to respond to my emails I decided to print off a list of all my objections to your messages."

How to apply for a job, then vs. now

'Corporate Sydney'

'I want a holiday that will impress the neighbours, which country offers most kudos to the Pound?'

'Sub lease' and 'Executive suite' putting money into a smug piggy bank

'Remember Jones, the customer is always right, no matter how stupid and ignorant he may be.'

'He said he knows the letters but he doesn't know the words.'

'The principal will be with you shortly. He still has a few e-mail jokes to read.'

"It may well be the root of all evil, but it's also the root of all this."

Medical Billing & Coding

Good report, Morton, work on it a little more until it sounds like one of mine.

First-Customer-Earned

'Money isn't everything...but it should be.'

"It needs a lot of editing."

'I march to a different arithmetic.'

"Today's meeting is about meeting to plan a meeting to arrange a meeting about managing our meetings."