Investor In Property Drama Pillows

UP Again: Housing Prices.

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

“It's $195 million. Now, I know what you're thinking: 'OK, what's the catch?'”

"I've invested in property..."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

'Your mortgage is under water...so what's the problem?'

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'On the face of it, it sounds great that she left me her house, but it has gone stale and what Hansel and Gretel didn't eat the birds have had a go at.'

"Local authorities are always whining on about the cost of 'affordable' housing..."

The End of the Property Boom is Nigh.

House hunting is cruel.

"The roof is old and leaks. The good news is when it rains you'll get an additional 3 showers."

'Oh no! We're in negative equity.'

'They're playing house.'

"I told you we should have sold last winter."

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

"The landlord has promised to sort out the damp problems."

At The Clown Bank.

Estate Agent - 'They're all mine.'

Mortgage up: 'Where?.'

Strip Mine Estates - Mineral Rights? They're All Yours.

'If you promise to never try to openthe locked attic door, the owner will take $20,000 off!'

'Here's the 2 acres of beachfront property you bought - too bad it's only six inches wide.'

'Thank God I don't live in a Jimmy Choo!'

Model Village/Realistic Model Village.

"It's a bit of a fixer-upper."

'My expedition confirmed what we already suspected: Two-thirds of the Earth's surface is covered by water, and the rest by real estate!'

'I wish I'd listened to Sarah Beeny now.'

Today's dream house is nothing if not a fantasy.

Affordable housing