Investment Competitor T-Shirts

'Don't let this market get to you, Dave. Remember, it's happening to your brother-in-law, too.'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

In the Guru District

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

Mario Draghi

"DeepSeek" "Stargate"

Guy has framed 'first Yuan'

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

Boss to worker taking out wallet: 'It's only fair, Pete. Last year, we shared profits!'

"I think I just solved my cash flow problem."

'I'm sorry I missed your recital. Daddy was on the phone with his broker, checking on bond yields. It's another form of bonding, son.'

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

'Plimbco Bank &Trust, Old Money Division.'

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"When was the last time you exercised something other than a purchase option?"

"Call security, Miss Rightman. I have an overwhelming urge to throw good money after bad"

"When the company announced that they're gonna move our retirement accounts down to Mexico, I was like '401 Que Pasa?'"

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

Man pushing Euro sign up a hill.

Preparing for casual dress friday at the investment bank.

'I highly recommend this painting if you're interested in art as an investment.'

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

'Make them a four billion dollar takeover offer, but don't cause a fuss.'

'My interpretation is that it deals with the artist's utter frustration over the scarcity of remaining, reasonable equity values.'

Pillaging, formerly Acquisitions Department

"With this company, it's like 'Adventure Capital."

Saving for College.

Cartoon about having many investors for crowd funding.

Wealth Juggler.

"If I'm such a poor risk, how did I get so deep into debt?"

Greed.