Investigative Storyteller Gifts

"I miss the challenge of the old days, the excitement, intrigue..."

Shepherd and eurydice

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

I should be a writer when I grow up...

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Squeezing the Free Press.

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

Victor Hugo

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'

Facts of life - The birds and the dogs.

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

Swan Fairy Tales

Dog chews 'The Cat Book'.

Edgar Allen Poe

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

Sure, he likes it here - he's a cartoonist.