Introverted Philosopher T-Shirts

I'm Apathetic And Nobody Cares.

'I'm not here!'

"He's a man of few words."

'Actually, I don't get out much. I spend most of my time alone, writing lyrical novels celebrating nature and the interconnectedness of all living things!'

"Too crowded. Let's go."

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

Self-Isolating. Do Not Disturb (Except For Food).

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

"I'm leaving. It's just way too much collaborating."

It's not considered drinking alone if the cat is at home.

"Sigh...Another sherry Harold...Go team ect."

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

She required plenty of personal space.

'How come we never get invited to 'come as you are' parties?'

Emily Dickinson at a Cocktail Party: "I;m Nobody! Who are you? Are you - Nobody - too?"

'A quick pint or a quiet drink?'

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

'Mind if I join you?'

Brown Non-Recluse Spider

'You can social network me behind my ears if you like.'

'Before you go, introduce yourself, so that I know who you were...'

Big Talk/Small Talk.

"The joy of the house to myself"

"I'm more of an 'I like to watch' dog."

Introverted Chair

"Who's my perfect little excuse to leave social functions? You are, yes you are."

"I work from home because I can’t stand the sight of idiots." "Is that why you got rid of all our mirrors?"

"I don't want to go back to school; other people are my kryptonite."

"I've replaced all the workers with machines, but now I crave human interaction!"

People I've Met At Parties Whose Names I've Forgotten

'You cant do anything these days without someone suspecting your motives. . . there is only one way out. . . inaction.'

"How much longer with this social distancing thing?"

"Are you still mad at me?" "Mentally I'm storming off right now."