Introvert Advocates Pillows

An Introvert's Guide to Surviving a Party

A man's head retreats into his body and slowly reappears piece by piece.

"Too crowded. Let's go."

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

Self-Isolating. Do Not Disturb (Except For Food).

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

She required plenty of personal space.

'How come we never get invited to 'come as you are' parties?'

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

'A quick pint or a quiet drink?'

'Not only do we have no natural enemies we have no natural friends.'

'Mind if I join you?'

Meet The Author's Wife. The author is too surly to talk.

Niche Extracurriculars

Honestly, I don't know why I even bring Harold to parties.

Brown Non-Recluse Spider

"I'm upstairs right now. On weekends and holidays, I go downstairs."

"Well at least nobody notices we don't go out much anymore."

Big Talk/Small Talk.

"In your own time, Brian, in your own time."

"I have to cancel our plans. I feel a headache coming on."

'You ought to get out more according to experts.'

'You cant do anything these days without someone suspecting your motives. . . there is only one way out. . . inaction.'

"The joy of the house to myself"

"It's from the Hendersons. They want us to come over this weekend."

"I don't want to go back to school; other people are my kryptonite."

"I work from home because I can’t stand the sight of idiots." "Is that why you got rid of all our mirrors?"

Introverted Chair

While you were out...

"Are you still mad at me?" "Mentally I'm storming off right now."

"This isn't working out - I'm an earthworm and you're a....are you even listening to me?"

"Do you think solitude drives you insane?"

The reserved and the go-ers.'

"The thing about society is that it gives me such anxiety..."