Interview Imitator Pillows

'Sorry Mr Jones, we don't think you're the right person to work here at the Serious Fraud Office.'

'You can name your salary... but don't name it 'Fred'. That's mine.'

"To make this interview more entertaining I would like you to take a breath of helium before answering the questions."

"Where do you see yourself in 20 to 25 years?"

"Elfis"

Ventriloquist Grave

"Now can I be in one of your comics?"

"I know you used to be our paperboy. That's why when you leave, you'll find your resume on the roof."

"I'm fascinated by your résumé, particularly the advertising supplement."

"When I grow up, I want to be a Presidential impersonator on 'Saturday Night Live.'"

Your performance since you came here suggests you may have lied on your resume.

"We pay the living dead wage."

"... and the fact that I ain't never caught a rabbit should have no bearing on our friendship."

"Where do you see yourself in five moves?"

"Where do you see yourself in the next twenty minutes at 375 degrees."

Will Curl Lip For Food

Plankton impersonator gets stuck in a whale.

"My next song is a little ditty about why I don't have any references."

"You're not giving me the job because I'm 'over qualified'? Oh, don't worry, most of those qualifications have been falsified."

"Thanks for coming in again. Sorry about the last time. I must have pulled the wrong lever by mistake."

Copycat.

Thesaurus Editors Applicants,Candidates,Entrants,Inquirers,Job-seekers.

"So when did you interest in health and safety start?"

'Hello, 911?'

"No, I'm really into this series, I am just not into you making a very poor attempt at copying their British accent every waking minute until we finish it."

'I'm not sure that mentioning your diploma in 'Monkey Business' really helps your resume...'

"The position on offer comes with a seven figure income. ?12,469.37."

"One of the great impressionists."

"Howard used to be an Elvis look-alike."

"May I have your autograph?"