Internet Privacy Savvy Pillows

"His last wish was that we delete his browsing history."

Hate Platforms

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

'More government surveillance!'

"These targeted ads are getting out of hand."

"It's nothing, go back to sleep. I was just getting a DNA sample."

'We have some facts about you that you don't remember, some that you thought were really secret, and some that never even happened.'

"Good afternoon, Ted. I'm your online presence."

"We've updated our privacy policy...it's so private we can't even tell you."

Hidden Facebook Features

"I said on the phone '2 percent.' I’m sure the NSA would back me up."

To get past the gates of Heaven you have to now enter an internet style password

"Remember when, on the Internet, nobody knew who you were?"

"Fill out all these highly intrusive forms...we can't wait!"

'The best way to protect your privacy is through a flood of misinformation obscuring the truth.'

'Never mind how accurate they are -- How DISCREET are they?'

Obama's surveillance of America.

USA 2030

"You never call, and the federal government will back me up on that."

"Please enter the last 4 digits of your SSN...or enter all 9. They're all over the dark web."

'Just give me the computer password, Marie. I won't put any more embarrassing pictures of you on Facebook.'

"You have been specially selected to upload your bank details. Offer ends midnight."

A Failiure to Communicate

"Tonight, Daddy's going to teach you how to stay save on the internet."

"Didn't anyone ever warn you about opening an e-mail from someone you don't know?"

'Computer crime' 'To see your belongings visit our website www,burgular.com'

'You can't beat the old style security systems!'

"The key to happiness is privacy. Hear what I'm sayin'?"

"It's 'She's driving me crazy and I'm not sure whom to turn to.' "