Internet Pirate Pillows

'Ok, I may have abused my download privileges,'

'Let's not go by the book.'

No caption. (On a pirate ship various flags fly, including flags with a skull and crossbones and other banners showing logos from various social media sites. On the boat deck below, a pirate is looking at his cell phone).

'Isn't he supposed to sit on your shoulder Captain?'

Music downloads

"Shiver-me-timbers, wench! How many times have I got to tell you? I'm not winking at you!"

"Shall I let them breathe."

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

Captain Hook's lesser known brother - Captain Spatula

'...the storm raged and the doctor got drunk to steady his nerves..'

"If you're wondering why you've been chosen 'Employee of the week,' it's because your work load is about to increase, while your pay remains the same."

'It's a treasure map.'

Meet the Shameless Self-Promoter 2 PM

'I heard that the new captain was raised on a farm.'

"How many letters can you read?"

What if Pirates Were Born With Their Wooden Leg?

Tiger discovers the online wildlife trade.

"Can you sign this copy I downloaded off the internet?"

"You go pillage. I can loot from here."

"Hello, I am a Nigerian Prince and I need your help!!! Please send me $500 and your bank routing number. You will rewarded with 10% of 12.7 million dollars and my undying friendship. Best wishes, Prince John Barron."

I'd rather be phishing.

'They aren't shy about cutting you out of the decision making process.'

Finance piracy

'You're allergic to feathers.'

'Computer crime' 'To see your belongings visit our website www,burgular.com'

'...if he only knew what I wrote about him on my blog.'

"After careful deliberation, I've decided I can no longer represent you as your lawyer in this case."

'Interesting business plan.'

'Wow...you must have had a really bad day, eh, mate?'

'Because I don't want you to be part of the decision - making process, that's why!'

"We've gleaned all we need to know about you from the internet, but we'll keep your resume as a great example of creative writing."

Captain Hook's lesser known brother - 'Captain Giant Foam Finger'.

"Well yes, I've been away for a long time, but you knew I worked on a Pirate Ship when we got married..."

"Erik does most of his plundering online these days"

'Here be our new flag, me hearties! A truly Jolly Roger, from now on, we're all about bein' upbeat an' optimistical!!'