Intergalactic Traveler Pillows

"Hold that thought. I have to go take a number five."

"When you add up how much it costs for fuel, supplies, and getting a sitter, it doesn't seem worth it to invade Earth."

3C-Keep Your Eye On The Road

"Remember everybody, this is planet Earth, so whatever you do, don't drink the water!"

'My skills travel well.'

You Are Here.

'Zylo, you know there's a leash law on this planet!'

"I hate to blow the place up, but it's way out of compliance with Galactic standards."

"Did you bring more cars?"

Spaceman (outside his ship) looking at aliens on a planet.

'What do you mean my policy does not cover for this sort of thing!'

'Good afternoon, Earthling -- I represent the 'Encyclopedia Galactica,' and....'

'Hiya, spaceman.'

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

I'm not sure I'm in the right Thursday night encounter group.

'I'd like to give a break but you were doing 186,000 miles per second!'

Man entering spaceship is asked for his passport

'Three zillion, five hundred trillion and sixty seven billion light years from Zog and now you tell me you've forgot to cancel the milk!'

'I love visiting Earth; it's the only place you can still play proper air guitar.'

'If anybody's gotta go, this is the time to speak up.'

Alien has his flying saucer tires stolen on the bad side of town.

The good news is that the 'Cow-Ray' has done minimal damge to the ship, captain!...

'Ooohhh, that one's got purple in it.'

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

'Okay, let's make it a quick in and out — we don't want Larry King interviewing us.'

"I'm so sorry I let you talk me into letting you take your pet along on this trip!"

"Oh the little green men are from the planet Thargon, we're the big blue men from Zefflon 8."

"But on my claim form, it definitely says Universal credit..!!"

Alien getting coffee.

"Are we nearly there yet?"

What NASA is not telling us...

"Take me to your mechanic."

"The only planet within a radius of 8975 light years . . . you're simply unable to back into a parking space!"

"Are we there yet?"

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"