Installations Gifts

Modern Art 'D Hirst' and 'A Nutter'

Tate Modern: Turbine Hall

"The catalogue raisonné of Christo"

Slant On Art

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

Computer Expert

Convenience.

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

Dogs looking at a fire hydrant in an art gallery.

Congratulations! - You have been nominated for the Turner Prize...

"To toast!"

The Guy Who Was Hooked Up To The Wrong Machines

Undertaker with 'light', 'done', and 'RIP' settings on his toaster.

Kathleen felt she was stuck between Iraq and a heart place.

"It comes with three programs! Single, married and kids!"

"It's okay, fellahs - only another bloody statue of Gormley by Gromley!"

"Sarge, this soup tastes watery."

"He only made first four installments."

Pumping up wig in blender.

"I love every single one of these."

All the other land having been claimed and fenced already, Jedidiah bought his own range from the big box store.

Why don't you look at ME that way?

"Dear Mum, please stop sending me food parcels..."

"For your birthday, I got you a food processor!"

'The light stays on after I shut the door.'

'I may not know much about art but I know what I like to slag off.'

The Winds of War

'Well, no wonder -- you should have had it winterized.'

Big Quiz. -900. +4800. +7230. Ernie, can you believe he calls himself a "smart appliance"?

"Look at it this way -- in three years your roof could leak."

"Sky, sir?"

"Well sure, as art it sucks, but that's a lot of bricks to move."

Your appliance maintenance agreement just expired. I'm here for your appliance...'

The Tragic Story of a Man With a Pace Maker and A Witch With a Microwave.