Insomniacs United Pillows

"I'm a Sheep Dog, you would think that counting sheep would help me sleep, but no..."

"Try thinking about something else."

'I never get a good night's sleep. Thank God for these office meetings!'

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

"About that insomnia...have you tried counting billable hours?"

"You were ho-ho-hoing in your sleep again!"

"They say this will keep us up all night like that's a bad thing."

"When Van Gogh had insomnia he created masterpieces."

"Before I prescribe a sleeping pill, I'd like you to try the opera."

Cats. All they do is eat and sleep. Truth is, they don't even do that well.

'Insomnia, eh? -- Drink a glass of warm milk and watch some C-Span.'

"Sleep? No, I'm the anxiety fairy. How about a cuppa joe?"

"If you can't sleep you may as well be productive and guard the meth lab."

Gracie can't sleep by counting sheep so she sleeps by counting A+ grades.

"This book put me to sleep—It was wonderful."

A girl wakes up to see her dollhouse is haunted.

When animal cloners suffer from insomnia.

"Damn! I STILL can't sleep!"

"Perhaps you slept SLOWER than usual..."

"We'd like you to invest in alternative energy. It's called sleep."

"See how much better you look after a good nights sleep."

'Never, Ever...try to figure out the meaning of life in the middle of the night.'

"He's chasing his dreams."

"This is a wonderful CV Mrs. Wilson!"

"You've been daylighting, haven't you ?"

"I couldn't sleep."

"Must you page swipe so loudly?"

"It's 4 A.M.—maybe you'd sleep better if you bought some crap!"

I couldn't sleep so I thought I'd embroider my memoirs a bit.

'It's great that you can laugh at yourself, but can you not do it in the middle of the night?'

Daily Promise...

'One will help you sleep like a log. The other one's to keep the termites away.'

'The new baby? Oh he's great! I haven't slept in 4 days, but the baby is great!'